you broke my heart when the July 28th is ended and you dont even say a word. dont you remember? i hate you!!!!


:'(

Just like heaven

i am crazy about the cheap stuffs at masjid jamek and jalan tar. so yesterday, i was asking some friends to join me out. thanks to SARAH MUNIRAH, ZAWANI ZAHARI for coming far away from Ipoh Mali. so sweet of you guys! not to forget, my twin,  SAFFURRA. we were born on the same day! i am glad that our plan was running smoothly like we wanted even I was kinda late, hehe...I am overly joyed when I got myself a new purse, some brooches and two scarves for Raya.

wani bought cakes for our birthday . thnks xoxo

Selamat Berpuasa Guys.

i am 19 already!

i am glad that i am still alive :)

19 years of living this life has taught me a lot.

which has ups and downs, happy and sorrow, smile and frown, fit and sick.

parents that love me, friends who care for me, teacher who support/guide me, love which never fade (ehem :P)

thanks to Allah for giving me such pleasure.

thnks to meor azeem meor azli. for wishing me exactly at 12.01. he prepared for it and i am happy you did it :) HAHA. 

thnks to erin, ayu, tiqa salleh, wani zahari, haziq, cause you guys texted me while i was asleep :O

thnks to those who wish me in fb too.

* i am waiting for two special friends to wish me, better you mind yourself to wish me. if you dont, i might piss of and your life would be a disaster. haha (so mean!) :DDD

Monkey in the house.

Today, I woke up late as usual. As I went down to settle with the unfinished chores, my mom grabbed me outside. She said she has something to show me and I might startled because of it. Unfortunately, it was not a present. I was clueless and just followed her lead restlessly. Suddenly, I was shocked when there was a monkey at our lawn. From what she told me, she saved the monkey from these two bad dogs. By the time, she tried to save the monkey, he acted wild. However, he still cannot move as his right leg was bleeding. After that, my mom came back with net this time to bring it inside. She afraid that the dogs might attacked the monkey again. Now, the monkey has been given fully protection, shelter and also foods for living. Now, we are waiting for his recovery. We might release him tomorrow. Our cat was locked inside since the monkey was dangerous enough which might killed our cat even he was trapped.

Poor monkey :)

puasa nazar..

today is the day two of my puasa nazar. i suppose to finish it a long time ago. but there was a confusion about this puasa. all this while, i have been hoping and asking Allah to get upm tesl. however, when the result was coming out, it turned out that i got uitm shah alam. it's was a shock to me. i just dont get it on how this upu things work. whatever! so after i got my result, i have no idea to do it or not, i should or shouldnt do this puasa nazar as the result is different from what i asked for.

well, here i am. i just think that i should. seems like Allah wanna test me if i still being grateful with his given fortune. i am so lucky to be among those teslians. thanks Allah.

lost.

umi and i wanted to go to hkl

when we were at jalan tun razak,

we asked ppl on how to get there.

two indonesians, 'akak sudah jauh ni. hospital nya di belakang'

then, we rode there like they said, still lost.

we asked others again

now, some corporates took our attention to ask help

'i know how to get there but it;s hard to tell , heee but it's in jalan tun razak'

ok, aunty indon tipu kami, damn.

then, we went back to the same first road.

at last, we called abah. he's the expertise about road in kl, believe me -,-

finally, we reached hkl. umi's co-worker, puan rosmawati were waiting for us at ward. her husband was at icu before.dia punya tulung rusuk tekena divider jalan.  now. he's at jabatan saraf and can already talk and move his body. dia pengiring polis our pm, najib. so the other day, najib visited him. i saw in berita.  

scary sgt , tetibe rasa insaf bila tgk dia. 

Allah bg dugaan bersesuaian dgn kemampuan kita. 

semoga isteri dia tabah dlm menjaga suami dia , amin.

life that i have now extremely hates me...

:'(

this post contains 75questions..bare with me ;)

75 questions to ask yourself

1. Why not me? cause you didnt choose me! xD

2. Am I nice? sometimes..

3. Am I doing what I really want to do? yes since i care about future.

4. What am I grateful for? still live as a muslim.

5. What’s missing in my life? strength

6. Am I honest? when i want to

7. Do I listen to others? frankly not 

8. Do I work hard? only when it's last minute work

9. Do I help others? must ask others xD

10. What do I need to change about myself? my weight :(

11. Have I hurt others? a lot and we are not friends anymore

12. Do I complain? many times.

13. What’s next for me? tesl degree

14. Do I have fun? yes 

15. Have I seized opportunities? i miss one

16. Do I care about others? yup if they care  about me.

17. Do I spend enough time with my family? for now, yesss. but when degree starts, i dont think so.

18. Am I open-minded? i dont know

19. Have I seen enough of the world? malaysia yes. haha.

20. Do I judge others? yes for the new friends.

21. Do I take risks? yes, when i've the urge to take.

22. What is my purpose? to be  a good muslimah and marry a nice guy on earth.

23. What is my biggest fear? coakcroaches and fall in love.

24. How can I conquer that fear? run.

25. Do I thank people enough? literally nope. and i regret that.

26. Am I successful? as a student, not my best yet.

27. What am I ashamed of? i say before think

28. Do I annoy others? i dont know

29. What are my dreams? to get into heaven

30. Am I positive? no

31. Am I negative? no xD

32. Is there an afterlife? of course!

33. Does everything happen for a reason? elders said so

34. What can I do to change the world? be a teacher /lecturer

35. What is the most foolish thing I’ve ever done? i lied 

36. Am I cheap? no.

37. Am I greedy? money yes. power yes.

38. Who do I love? family, since no bff/bf

39. Who do I want to meet? someone which i left 6years ago

40. Where do I want to go? makkah

41. What am I most proud of? meaghan waller. i love her confidence!

42. Do I care what others think about me? i dont care.

43. What are my talents? singing, acting, controlling, haha.

44. Do I utilize those talents? for fun only.

45. What makes me happy? hang out with friends, holiday.

46. What makes me sad? my cats die.

47. What makes me angry? you take advantage on me

48. Am I satisfied with my appearance? no, i am obese!

49. Am I healthy? of course no

50. What was the toughest time in my life? now

51. What was the easiest time in my life? year 6

52. Am I selfish? sometimes, not intended at all.

53. What was the craziest thing I did? being a bad girl

54. What is the craziest thing I want to do? i want to fall hard for someone

55. Do I procrastinate? always

56. What is my greatest regret? spm

57. What has had the greatest impact on my life? spm

58. Who has had the greatest impact on my life? mom and cousins

59. Do I stand up for myself? yes

60. Have I settled for mediocrity? human aren't perfect though.

61. Do I hold grudges? yes, for someone. i know it's bad thing.

62. Do I read enough? no. i am not into reading

63. Do I listen to my heart? yes, i believe in intuition

64. Do I donate enough to the less fortunate? i dont have anything :(

65. Do I pray only when I want something? no

66. Do I constantly dwell on the past? yes, cry hard

67. Do I let other people’s negativity affect me? yes even i try not to.

68. Do I forgive myself? no

69. When I help someone do I think “What’s in it for me”? no

70. Am I aware that someone always has it worse than me? yes

71. Do I smile more than I frown? yes

72. Do I surround myself with good people? yes, they are kind.

73. Do I take time out for myself? a lot

74. Do I ask enough questions? more than enough xD

75. What other questions do I have? am i waiting for someone? literally yes!

lame yet best!

renungan #1

Seorang wanita boleh memasuki pintu syurga melalui pintu surga yang mana saja yang disukainya, cukup dengan 4 syarat saja, yaitu: shalat 5 waktu, puasa di bulan Ramadhan, taat kepada suaminya dan menjaga kehormatannya.

i am not a good teacher..

i wanna share something and this post might turn out very long and i warn you not to read okay, haha.

i have two brothers. both are twins. well, since they are going to take spm this year, i am willing to teach them certain subjects that i could. actually they are arts stream students. so for the past 3months, i have been tutoring my brothers at home and every single night we did that. however, i became less enthusiast and less spirit in teaching them anymore. they are very lazy and what can i say is they are not interested in studying. i am not sure because of what. but i think the gf thingy is really disturbing. because during my high school years, i just have to refuse to go along with this couple thing instead focus more on my study. maybe mrsm environment differs from public school. huh. then, everytime i got back home from work, both of them, were sitting on the comp table passionately playing dota together. i always give advice and always blabber which is good huh. i thought. cause that's the only thing that i can do at the moment. one thing for sure , they do not have their own goal in their lives. if i ask them, i know they stiil do not know what they gonna be and gonna do in future but they know that they want to live happily with their gf( i read their phones , wink, haha). and for the sake of truth, they are not going to marry the girl because thousand of girls in university are much more pretty than they have in schools now! sometimes i cried about this cause i feel responsible to take care of my brothers to make their lives better... hmm, i dont know what else i could do. whatever they are like, i am still their sis and i will change them from now. i will try.

mase kecik lg comey kan, haha.

"I never met a man I didn't like."-Will Rogers

it is hard to find someone who truly loves you and wants to live with you for the next thirty or forty years of marriage..and can stand under any circumstances..

yeay! i've made it through

it was hard at first not eating rice.
then, when you have the passion to lose your weight, you just have to be that diligent.
well, it has been 1week 2days.*wink* hehe..
i am glad that i am still alive even i dont eat rice, haha.
actually i thought i cant do this but i've made it through..

keep it up, alin...
hoping that i will lose some before raya!

marvellous huh, i guess i can replace rice with this, bhahaha. :P

awesome day with awesome ppl

ps; my feet hurt like hell after long walk. ;)

tesl , xoxo

i am sad. i am speechless.


knowing that i will further tesl in UiTM.
it's not that i'm not being grateful with the result, but i am hoping for upm tesl.
because i've cried too much when i knew that i am not going to get into UiTM during interview medsi.
it stated there , i have only one chance which is UPM. and now, UiTM is taking that place.

i guess i was only panicking for no reason.
i should be more relaxed ...

Alhamdulillah, wherever i will go, it's tesl, and i am okay with it :)

wedding day with the girlss!

On last sunday, we went to adzra sis's wedding. the theme, was black and white. it's simple but seemed elegant and couture, waaahhh. when simple, it gets better you know ;D  i went there with nabil and the other three girls, mira , ayu and adek mira. i am overly happy to have mira and ayu around. i guess we can named it as bestfriends' day. While on our way there, we kept talking and gigling and also taking pictures non stop and not realising that the journey almost took two hours. (nilai- meru)  we reached there safely, thanks to nabil. before balek , we get kek bahulu in the handy bag and also a chocolate that was made by hardworking bussinesswoman, mira. (dah maju nmpak, siap amek tmphn wedding tuh, jeles -,-)

now, time to upload some piccas, ;)

imsomniac

i always knew he'd never be mine yet i hoped..

wordless wednesday.

my huge mirror which i bought a few days ago just broke into pieces. i guess i am not that good at taking care stuffs. that's why i always lose something valuable.

syaitan hasut aku.

aku taktau knapa tp mlm ni saket sgt hati ngan certain ppl in my life.
aku rasa mcm nak sekeh2 je sorg2.
sbb x memahami aku.
kalau kwn tu, tlg la rajin2 kan diri nak tegur, ni kita je asek trhegeh2 kat dia. penat la mcm tu.
smpaikan skng ni, aku dah mls nak tego bila once aku dpt detect dia prangai cmni...
ade satu jenis lg, yg suka ditch ppl. at first, they are like the nicest person on earth and i would fall for him. tp bila  dia rasa mcm nak jauhkan diri, dia boley bla je cmtu like nothings happens. so sad.
geram2 , aku taktau knp mlm ni yg jd mlm tak baik n utk aku kutuk2 org. sorry tp rasa mcm nak luahkan je. gram ni...

loneliness is killing me.

how i wish you could be mine,

yes, there was this abang who has such a great body to see and be with, no offend. :D

well, he's handsome but still, no guarantee for a great future.

abang has no job, i guess. but he's hot. he's six packs. dammit!

he asked me out and said if i could go for a dinner with him.

i replied 'never mind, i was full abang' but deep inside, omg! abg ajak kuar, wahh, mimpi jd realiti. hahaha.

ps for me:

okay , since adek takde kerja so lately nampaknye smakin mnggatal ye tangan2 dan mulut2, so balik la ke pangkal jalan ye adek. jangan dekat ngan mana2 abg, tundukkan pandangan anda, hahaha.

ni bukan abg tu tau :P

i used to be great once.

when i was in high school, i feel like i am on top of the world and overly happy with what i owned at that time, the title like you have the power to control something big and the strong bond between friends, and last but not least, having an affair with some guys.

but now, i guess i have grown up.

i have been matured enough after i took asasi tesl. i've learned those aren't matter to me anymore.

maybe friends and cousins have influenced me so much to be a better person. 

life is too short to live so make it wonderful and prepare for the hereafter before it's too late.

ps: Allah, please help me to endure this pain in getting close to you. amin...

the lucky ones, congrats.

my bff, she has gotten into one of this universitas in Indon. great huh? jelaous me. fineeee. nak tgglkan aku, hmm, org blaja rajin2 pergi oversea. nothing to say except all the best hun!

next is wani, congrats too for your good news. i bet i'm the only one who knew about this. butttt, she didn't want to tell me further about it, im okayyy with it, :D

tiqa, she's missing his husband, haha. well, he just went to russia. huh, sape suh cari laki pandai :P, (ape aku merepek ni, kbye)

i miss my uni's life, huh//